Effective Parenting Techniques

There are so many things in the world that people do to help children. Many people volunteer to help children and some decide to raise a child. Out of all the things to do raising a child is most difficult, and also very rewarding. When an individual chooses to be a parent, he or she should have four traits: a positive lifestyle, stability, tolerance, and patience. Having these traits helps on the long road of effective parenting (The Nemours Foundation, 2011). Discussion of Topic When an individual has a positive lifestyle, their child will look up to their parent. A positive lifestyle is good for a child because a parent is considered a role model. This means parents should have a job, a car, a place to live (a apartment or house), not abuse drugs or alcohol, and speak using manners. For example, if a child hears his parent cursing or using vulgar language the child is more likely to use it himself. Even if the child sees his parent working hard to make a good living, they are more likely to work hard to achieve the same thing (The Nemours Foundation). According to a Scottish government report, the keys to giving a child a good start in life is to love, cuddle, and red bedtime stories. Scotland must become a more â€Å"child-friendly† place with a renewed focus on improving early years through measures such as a new generation of family centers funded through private, public and not-for-profit sources. Children were always acting out anywhere they where and in order for this to stop parents had to pay much more attention to their kids (Currie Brian, 2011). Parents often become less involved in the lives of their children as they nter the middle grades. But your young adolescent needs as much attention and love from you as he needed when he was younger and maybe more. A good relationship with you or with other adults is the best safeguard your child has as he grows and explores. By the time he reaches adolescence, you and he will have had years of experience with each other; the parent of today's toddler is parent to tomorrow's teenager (Effective Parenting, 2006). Your relationship with your child may change. In fact, it almost certainly must change; however, as she develops the skills required to be a successful adult. These changes can be rewarding and welcome. As your middle school child makes mental and emotional leaps, your conversations will grow richer. As her interests develop and deepen, she may begin to teach you how to slug a baseball, what is happening with the city council or county board or why a new book is worth reading (Effective Parenting, 2006). When our children behave badly, we may become angry or upset with them. We may also feel miserable because we become angry or upset. But these feelings are different from not loving our children. Young adolescents need adults who are there for them – people who connect with them, communicate with them, spend time with them and show a genuine interest in them. This is how they learn to care for and love others. According to school counselor Carol Bleifield, â€Å"Parents can love their children but not necessarily love what they do, and children need to trust that this is true. † (Effective Parenting, 2006) Young adolescents need support as they struggle with problems that may seem unimportant to their parents and families. They need praise when they've done their best. They need encouragement to develop interests and personal characteristics. Psychologist Diana Baumrind identifies three types of parents: authoritarian, permissive, and authoritative. By studying about findings from more than 20 years of research, she and her colleagues have found that to be effective parents, it's best to avoid extremes. Authoritarian parents who lay down hard-and-fast rules and expect their children to always do as they are told or permissive parents who have very few rules or regulations and give their children too much freedom are most likely to have the most difficult time as parents. Their children are at risk for a range of negative behavioral and emotional consequences. However, authoritative parents, who set limits that are clear and come with explanations, tend to struggle less with their adolescents. â€Å"Do it because I said so† probably didn't work for your son when he was 6 and it's even less likely to work now that he's an adolescent (Effective Parenting, 2006). Young adolescents need strong role models. Try to live the behavior and values that you hope your child will develop. Your actions speak louder than words. If you set high standards for yourself and treat others with kindness and respect, your child stands a better chance of following your example. As adolescents explore possibilities of who they may become, they look to their parents, peers, well-known personalities and others to define who they may become (Effective Parenting, 2006). There are also the five B’s for effective parenting which are be positive, be specific, be certain, be consistent, and be immediate. People including children do things for one of two reasons: to avoid pain or to pursue pleasure. As a parent, you constantly work between these two options. If you use lots of negatives like punishments to drive behavior, your child will do just enough to avoid the pain. Rewarding good behaviors rather than punishing bad ones, improves the chance that you'll get cooperation and not conflict from your child. Noticing unacceptable behaviors and stopping them with a punishment is easy. It takes effort to recognize good behaviors and praise them. You'll need to do both; but the more you recognize the good, the less likely you are to see the bad (Effective Parenting, 2006). Relevant Chapters In chapter 8 of the text it talks about the self view of children during their school years. It talks about how preschoolers develop their self-concepts as a result of how their parents treat them and based on the society and culture they live in. Like in Erikson’s initiative vs. guilt is when children act independently, but feel guilt or sense of failure when they don’t succeed or are belittled for the action. The foundational concept of this stage is that children become aware that they are people and begin to make decisions that shape the kind of person they are to become. Children with supportive parents later become independent and autonomous. Children with restrictive or overprotective parents later feel shame and self-doubt. Good effective parenting skills are needed in order for children to become great people in life. Summary In order to have good parenting skills a parent needs to have great effective parenting techniques like using the five B’s. Using the five B’s will get your children to have better cooperation and will never act out as much. Children will always need support from their parents whenever they have issues. They also need to have strong role models because if they don’t then how are they going to learn when they make mistakes. Parents are the ones that have to teach their children what is right from wrong. As kids grow older they make mental leaps that will later create better conversations. Children will become great adults if parents follow effective parenting techniques.